Even if you once made Amanda Hesser's "Single Girl Salmon" and even if your husband loved it and even if he keeps bringing it up like, "remember two and a half years ago when you made that salmon and it was so pretty and when will you make THAT again" and even if it's almost your one year anniversary so you really should do something nice even THEN, if you don't like salmon, don't make it again.

Because surely the only thing you will be thinking while making it is how you dislike salmon and how Jeff only liked it that one time because he got to eat two fillets since you picked at yours and are there any good snacks in the pantry for you since you are sauteeing something you'll never eat and WHERE is the lid to this saucepan and WHY does your husband insist on buying extra rolls of paper towels even though you have no storage space and they land in the place that you need to stash this pot that is IN YOUR WAY but he is on the phone and doesn't see you NEED HELP to fix his STUPID SALMON.

This is why for our anniversary proper we are going out to dinner. And why his salmon has joined my polenta on the list of dishes one spouse loves but will have to be satisfied with ordering in restaurants.